lank tangles

love. hate. i live with this excess of anger and love with very little room in between. the absence and overdose of one ultimately lead to the other. sometimes it seems even to me that these are the only two real emotions i can really feel. they are too easy to recognize. 

friendship is something i do not know how to handle. friendship is something i do not understand well. its love or hate, i cannot fathom friendship. it is uncertain, weak, pale, fleeting, ultrasensitive. such a difficult thing.

guilt i hate feeling the most. vacillating between right and wrong, feeling rotten for doing the wrong thing and justifying the deed in your mind. and vice versa.

it's all so confusing.